Note to Self (99) A friendship has died and we did nothing to save it

Promises never kept. Meaningless words. Dull moments shared together. Waste of time. Yet, I thought we were friends.

Like a good game of pool, our lives connected for a split second. You reached one pocket and I reached another one. The balls hit each other – a spark appeared and disappeared. Nothing to remember from our relationship. If it wasn’t for the trust I had in you, I’d have already moved on.

I watched you from afar. I never believed you could be such a thief. I didn’t see your true colors until recently. Your behavior hurt me and I tried to stop feeling like this. There’s really no need to dwell on the past. What happened between us is long gone. Memories fell down the drain and got flushed with the other bullshit I caught on the way. I try to be honest here. You ignored me. Maybe a talk would have been beneficial for both our sakes, but why do you care? You’re such a hypocritical bastard, you disgust me.

I expressed myself through words because I didn’t want to face you. I had enough of your fake excuses. I had enough of your made up reasons. You never loved me the way I did. I’m heartbroken and I need to mourn our friendship. I don’t give people third chances anymore. I’ve been burned too many times – you pay the price for everybody else’s mistakes. You knew it though, so you’ve been warned. You decided nonetheless to play by your selfish rules.

I wish you good luck. I won’t be there next time you ask for advice or for help. I don’t think you’ll even ask anything of me. You never wanted to be my true friend. You just used me and when you were done, you tossed me away. Fair enough. Have fun living the lie you built and pretend nothing ever went wrong. I’m done talking about you.

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